Tuesday, January 25, 2011

Dear Princess

Dear Little Princess with stars in your eyes, the daughter I dream to to someday have, when you are old enough to realize boys don't have cooties and you think you might want to kiss one,- you teenage girl that believes that your love is the first of its kind and that no one older than you has any idea what you are going through or how true your love is. Dear early 20's nearly a woman who believes the older the man, the more mature and smarter they are, the one that believes his money will last forever and that him buying you all you ask for is real love, the one that is still with her high school sweetheart and wants to get married before college is over because your life isn't going to be as wonderful as it could be without having that ring on your finger and the young woman that believes no other man will love you as much as he does~

The fairy tales you read and watch on tv ARE FAKE! You will fall in love many times, but you will also fall out of love, you will think no one understands what you have and then you will find out that everyone else just didn't want to pop your rose colored bubble and that everyone else knew it wouldn't work out and they will all tell you that AFTER you've finally realized it and told them that. There are however, Dragons!! You will date them again and again, possibly even marry one. There will always be a "bag of hair", look for it as early in the relationship as you can. It might be a "bag of hair" you can deal with, but better to know early on if it isn't. You will date men who are nowhere near your "dream man" but as time goes on, and you invest more time, money, tears, love, and laughs with this man, you will alter your dream into your "reality man" and you will enjoy the good days and make excuses for the bad ones. You will find as you get older that more and more people give you their opinion of how you could do better than the man you are currently with, yet no one ever tells you how the "fairy tale" might end and no one has an alternative fairy tale ending for you. You see people who are still married to their high school sweethearts and also couples who you know "won't work out", get married, have the life you always wanted, (or they appear to) and you will wonder why it can't happen for you and won't seem to ever happen for you.

There is no prince charming. I'm sorry about that. And, I promise, if you think your man is, marry him, you'll understand what I'm saying then. There are on the other hand millions of frogs! Don't' go too far with them (if you get my drift) though, they will NEVER turn into a prince. There are TONS of witches, the only true part of the fairy tale. You're just going to have to learn to deal with those, and rest assured that one day you might become one. This Reality Tale that I'm describing to you doesn't happen to everyone, remember those that are still married, happily? I'm sure you can think of a few. Also, know that you don't need to settle for anyone, if you feel you are settling, I could almost guarantee that you will find happiness with someone else. But as I'm now (just) 31, with my baby clock ticking, while everyone around me is pregnant, I can see where a woman could be happy with the man she has, so that she can have a piece of her dream. When you want something badly, like a ring, wedding, house, car, pet husband, BABY.... it feels like everyone has it or is getting it, or getting more of it than you are and you are going in the wrong direction. Or like my favorite little saying, "just when I think I have all my ducks in a row, someone comes along and shoots one of them". Talk about a dream killer.

You will make mistakes with your heart, with your body, with your mind, and with your spirit, but hopefully you will LEARN from them. I do promise that learning from them will make the mistakes easier to bear when you look back on them, and trust me, you will look back on them more times than you would like to. Your family will more than likely never take them man you decide to be with forever, into their open arms and give their blessing, and if they do, they will secretly think you could do better and will tell you how they "have always felt" when and if you ever break things off.

I only tell you all of this because I want you to know the truth and because you will forget this letter and hopefully find it and re-read it when you need it most and realize that you are not alone in the world, the REAL world. I have been there too. Now, all that being said, don't ever give up YOUR dreams, dreams DO come true, for those who work harder for them than anyone else does. And I hope and dream for you that you have the Fairy Tale throughout your entire life, and if not, that you have moments of dreamland that you can cling to and bring you happiness when the witches and dragons have beat you down till you think you can't stand again. There is always a light; you just might have to look harder for it sometimes. Look for it in those tickles your Momma gives you, those moments when your Dad threatens to shoot your date if he makes you cry, when you have your first kiss and your heart wants to jump out of your chest. Find a light in the time spent with the best girlfriends you could ever ask for and when you realize your parents are and can be the best friends you ever knew and you know how much it means to have them and cry someday when you realize you might not have them forever, like I have.

I love you my Little Princess, sweet dreams, The End, Love forever, your future Mom.






Traci Spellings 1/6/11







Tuesday, January 23, 2007

I will wait for you

I will wait for you
To see my smiling face
And watch you walk on by
I will wait for you
To see me again
And decide to smile back this time
I will wait for you
To hear my laugh
And stop mid sentence to listen again
I will wait for you
To watch me leave
And wish you had taken the chance
I will wait for you
To think of me one day
When something makes you smile
I will wait for you
And the chance to eventually come
When you finally ask me to dance
I will wait for you
To smell the scent of my shampoo
And hold me close while the next song starts again
I will wait for you
To fall so madly in love
And realize that I’m the one
I will wait for you
To finally say “I do”
And make me the happiest woman alive
I will wait for you
No matter how long it takes
I will wait for you

Wednesday, January 03, 2007

Every day

Every day I get stronger
And I don’t pick up the phone to call
I don’t let the songs make me cry
And when looking out the window
Reminds me of you I look the other way

Every day I get stronger
And I try to think of other men
I remember this is the best thing for me
And for you and your family
Letting you go isn’t something
That I want to do again

Every day I get stronger
And I notice that I’m not thinking of you
Quite as often as I used to
I have hope that someone might equal you
And I’m ok without all you gave me
For now, till the right man comes along

Every day I get stronger
And start over fresh and new
With a clear mind and happy heart
And my life goes on without you there
I hope one day you understand
I don’t have any choice about it
Every day I get stronger

1/3/2006

Wednesday, August 02, 2006

Moment in Time

Time plays funny things with your mind
The good moments seem to fly by
Before you have time to blink
And you store them deep in your memory
Until something brings them back
And you smile or even laugh out loud
And just the moments when you remember
And your heart feels the same feeling
Makes the moment that flew by last
Just a little longer in your heart
And you realize that the moment passed
But the memory will always be there
And no one can take that away from you
That’s what our moments are for me
The things that happen when we are together
And even though we are apart now
I still carry those laughs, smiles, and sometimes tears
In my heart and deep in my mind
And when I have days that seem to drag on
And all I can think about is getting them over with
Something happens to me to remind me of you
And a moment in time that you
Brought something into my world that made me laugh
So hard that I will never forget it
Or feel so good about myself
That it makes me feel so good about myself over again
Or tears that I needed to shed or we shed together
That was just what I needed at that moment
I just want you to know that you are in my memory
And although those moments in time fly by so fast
You and our moments will last forever in my heart

Wednesday, July 05, 2006

through my smile

Through my smile
Everything is ok
My stars are in line,
The world is turning my way
But through my tears
I am walking away
From what I need most
I’ve seemed to have lost my way

Through my smile
Nothing stands in my way
I’m following my dreams
On the most beautiful of days
But through my tears
My fears they do stay
I’ve lost the reason to be
And yet there’s no reason to pray

Through my smile
Hopefully will come a day
When I can feel that it’s real
And my heart will be ok
And through my tears
I will be able to say
That this is the best it could ever be
......................

Friday, June 09, 2006

You Touch Me

You touch me with your hands so strong
Rough on the outside But smooth as silk against my skin
Wrapping my hand inside yours and my hair through your fingers

You touch me with your eyes dark as night
They see the real me, depths it takes me days to see
Watching me with wild exotic passion and intense love

You touch me with your words
All the right lyrics find their way into my soul
Whispers, laughs, and singing they all take me away

You touch me with your lips
Unexpected kisses against my skin
Your smile Brings my world to life

You touch me with your love
Something I thought I could never feel
I will never forget the feeling I have

You touch me with your spirit
Not even having a chance yet to Be set free
You hold Back so much and I can’t wait for you to share it all with me

You touch me with your song
Making the songs in our hearts finally Become one
The song in your heart Beats in time with mine

You touch me
In more ways that I can ever put down on paper
But I’m never going to stop trying till you understand
How you touch me

Monday, June 05, 2006

True Love Song

I know in my soul that every true love song begins and ends in us
So many years passed and our love never died
So much distance in between and the timing is never right
Can you feel my heart? It beats in time with yours
Against all things possible you and I were meant to be
I heard somewhere that love is friendship on fire
We have a fire that never stopped burning
As strong as the wind has blown it cant be put out
Tell me how two hearts that are meant to be,
Never come together at the right time.
Hearing your voice singing your love for me
My cheek resting in your hands, your lips against mine
Just looking into your eyes was like we were right back there again
The world stopped spinning and all that was left was us
We took the chance we missed out on, but it can never be enough.
Star crossed lovers and yet our paths never seem to cross
Ive spent my whole life looking for that one true love song meant for me
I shouldve known all along that I could find that in you.
Still I sit here tonight, lyrics and music blowing through my heart and soul
Knowing one day it will lead me once again to you, because
I know in my heart that every true love song begins and ends in us